Spider-Man Redux
by Al Evans
Summary: This is an anthology series where I fill in the blanks on various Spider-Man stories (usually from the comics) or do my own spins on them, sometimes taking them in very a different directions. Context is provided for readers unfamiliar with the canon. I hope you enjoy and please leave feedback!
1. Chapter 1: The Radioactive Question

**_Not long ago Peter Parker told Mary Jane about the origins of his powers. That story has set MJ's mind ablaze and she has a few more pressing questions for Mr. Parker._**

 _This story is set during the Spider-Man comics published in the 1980s. It's set at some point in between Amazing Spider-Man #275 when Peter tells Mary Jane his origin story._

 _This is my attempt to put some things to rest and it's also a kind of rebuttal towards Spider-Man: Reign._

 _Please leave a review as I am keen for feedback._

* * *

Mary Jane stood outside the door to Peter's Chelsea's apartment.

She was hesitating and wondered to herself why.

She had a key after all.

She'd returned it some months ago when she came back to New York, but it hadn't been too long before Peter had given it back to her.

He'd said it was a matter of practicality and trust. Ever since she'd (not entirely comfortably) become Peter's confidant in regards to most things (including his life as a certain web-slinger) she had found herself in frequent (too frequent for her liking) situations where she needed to get into Peter's apartment. Whether this was to pass him civilian clothes, patch up his wounds or generally just check up on him, they'd both agreed it made more sense for her to have her key back.

And they had both agreed it had meant nothing more than that.

Not like the _first_ time he'd given her his key...

But at this very moment Mary Jane wondered if she should knock so as to not be rude and just barge in. She knew that was a strange thought to be having after all the times she had done just that, and Peter had been perfectly fine with it. And it wasn't as if she hadn't seen him when he looked less than flattering.

Standing there though, Mary Jane knew that her hesitation had nothing to do with any of that. She simply didn't want to go in because she was worried that Peter would be inside. And if he was inside she knew she'd have to ask him some important questions, the answers of which she was terrified of hearing.

She had a sudden urge to run. That urge was an old companion of hers, and not one she was necessarily happy to indulge. Now, as was the case many years before, she was faced with a door, with Peter Parker and with a chance to run. Despite her apprehensions (and downright terror), for his sake, she hadn't run from Peter back then. And this time, for her own sake, she did the same.

She knocked on the door.

"Just a sec" a voice called from the inside. Peter opened the door and gave MJ a friendly wave when he saw her.

"Hi MJ. What brings you to casa Del Parker?"

MJ covered up the fear she'd had on her face with lightning speed (she'd had had plenty of practice in her time). She adopted a small and entirely fake smile.

"Just...just passing through. Wanted to see how you were...So...how are you?"

"I'm okay I guess. Well...I'm okay for me. This whole Flash thing hasn't exactly been a walk in the park"

MJ remembered all too vividly when her and Peter's old friend Flash Thompson was arrested on suspicion of being the super villain the Hobgoblin. It had upset her so she knew it'd done worse for Peter who'd known Flash longer. Evidently Peter wanted to get his mind off it because he abruptly changed the subject as he beckoned her inside.

"Come in, come in. I was just doing a bit of spring cleaning. I know its summer but with me I take what I can get you know."

As MJ walked in she only now observed that that the heat and the stuffy apartment had served to make Peter quite sweaty. He drank greedily from a glass of water and placed it back on a counter. MJ stared at the glass, specifically the faint marks where his lips had touched it. Peter noticed her staring and misread her expression.

"Sorry, where are my manners? You want something to drink?" He went over to his sink and picked up a glass by holding it from it's top.

"No!" MJ exclaimed. Peter stared at her, surprised by her tone.

"Oooookay then, no drink for Ms. Watson."

MJ's composure had gone but she tried to get it back.

"Sorry sorry I...umm. I'm just not thirsty I..."

Her efforts fell apart when she eyed a tissue box on Peter's table and gulped. Peter followed her eye line and when MJ stopped staring at it to look at Peter she saw an expression of complete bewilderment on his face. When MJ spoke again Peter turned to her and wiped this expression from his face.

"I actually...wanted to talk to you about something that was..." MJ trailed off when she caught a glimpse of the door to Peter's bathroom and a quick look of fear passed over her face for a second. She tired her best to continue.

"Something...something important that had gotten me..." She trailed off again as her eye moved now to Peter's bedroom door. She felt ever so slightly sick at the sight of it. When she registered that twinge of sickness she felt immense shame and, for a moment, a seething hatred directed at herself.

 _It's Peter...It_ _ **was**_ _Peter! How can you feel like this about him? He's your best friend. He used to..._

"MJ?" Peter asked with a curious and worried tone. MJ's mind was snapped back to the present. She inhaled and exhaled deeply through her nostrils before looking Peter dead in the eyes.

"Peter...the other day when you told me about...about how you got your powers..."

"The spider bite?"

"Yeah...the spider bite...the _radioactive_ spider bite, I...I only just thought to ask...are...Are _you_ radioactive?" She didn't break her stare and her insides were doing cartwheels in expectation of his answer. The fear which had slowly but surely engulfed Mary Jane ever since Peter had told her the other day about the origin of his powers now made her wait for an answer seem like years. Nevertheless it lasted only three seconds. Peter looked surprised to even be asked the question.

"What? Oh right, yeah I suppose it is an obvious question. No. No I'm not."

MJ still had a look of concern on her face, apparently not entirely convinced.

"How...how do you know?"

"How? Because I've conducted tests of course. I conducted some rudimentary ones not long after I got my powers. I mean there was minimal risk but why take the chance right? It is radiation after all."

Peter seemingly caught onto MJ's weird actions and sought to reassure her further.

"MJ seriously it's fine. If you're worried about being irradiated by being around me there is no risk. I wouldn't risk hurting you, or anyone else, if just being around me poses a danger of poisoned. I've had Reed Richards himself give me the all clear."

"Reed Richards?" MJ looked more optimistic. For some reason mentioning the name of the smartest man on Earth was reassuring.

"Yup" Peter continued. "See when I first got my powers I obviously played around with them on and off to test my limits and even to find out how they worked. That was how I figured out I could attune my spider tracers so they'd react to my spider sense. I mean I was 15 and a science nerd. You go through some complicated changes at the best of times at that age, but when you're worried you're going to maybe turn into a giant spider or something, you want to know what you're dealing with. And in my case, I wanted to know why I couldn't shoot webs or didn't grow eight eyes or something. Plus with my natural scientific curiosity I fascinated myself."

MJ gave an amused smile, which prompted Peter to smile back and continue.

"Well you can imagine how I was also concerned about my health due to being exposed to radiation. I ran some basic tests with the minor equipment I had and even some more sophisticated ones at a later date when I was able to access more advanced stuff.

I discovered my blood contained radiation within it and wondered about the rest of me. After all blood goes everywhere in the body so it wasn't a stretch to imagine that I had radioactive skin, saliva, sweat, breath...other stuff...But from the tests I was able to conduct, when I was looking for radioactivity I found nothing.

Somehow the radiation was in my blood and ONLY in my blood. I figured it was because the spider had bitten into a vein on my hand."

MJ looked quizzically at Peter now, her fear being replaced with genuine curiosity.

"But how could the radiation just stay in your blood? And how did you know it wasn't harmful?"

Peter leaned on the back of the sofa before carrying on, clearly enjoying his little lecture.

"Well the thing of it is MJ that the radiation the spider was exposed to was a unique form of radiation. It's not the kind of radiation you hear about which gives people cancer or radiation poisoning. It had been discovered and researched since the 1940s. When they found very little military application for it they let the general public know about it. The radiation could be controlled in a variety of ways and wasn't harmful so long as you didn't get exposed to it directly, and even then it had to be in massive doses.

A company called General Techtronics even created a machine which used and controlled this kind of radiation as part of genetic engineering experiments. That was the machine I visited at the science exhibit the day I got my powers. I mean if the scientists and authorities didn't have a good idea that this type of radiation was essentially risk free, do you really think they'd have allowed them to conduct an experiment using it in the middle of New York? Especially when anyone could just go and see the experiment up close without any form of protection; no lead shielding, no sunglasses, nothing."

"I guess not. But you didn't answer my other question. How does it just stay in your blood?"

Peter's delight and being able to talk science with MJ somewhat diminished when she asked this.

"To be honest I am not entirely sure. I mean I am something of a unique case. But somehow the radioactivity stays in my blood and only transfers elsewhere if my blood itself does and even then, the radioactivity is so low and sparse that you'd need a blood bag's worth before you found even a single radioactive particle. It's just a unique feature of my blood or of what the spider did to it, or maybe of the radiation itself. Heck maybe it's some combination of all those."

"So it's completely harmless?"

Peter's expression diminished further and he became solemn for a moment.

"Well...it's essentially harmless"

MJ gave an exacerbated sigh

"Uh oh"

"See, when I was a teenager Aunt May needed a blood transfusion and I was a viable donor. She needed it to get better but I really wasn't sure what the effects my blood might have. But at the time I was young and kind of naive, so it seemed like I didn't have much of a choice. I went ahead with it.

A long time after that she got sick. Turned out she'd absorbed a radioactive particle inside of her blood."

"Just the _one!_ " MJ exclaimed.

"Yep. Like I said the radioactivity is low grade and sparse. But it was enough to endanger her life. I had to get her a pretty pricy item called ISO-36 which could cure her condition. It worked like a charm and she was fine after that. But obviously I never wanted to transfuse my blood to anyone ever again. Actually it was that incident which sort of confirmed to me the radioactivity stayed in my blood. I mean after such a long time the particle would have passed into the rest of her blood or irradiated more of her, or even made her sicker."

The fear returned to MJ's face now and she spoke slowly with a slight shake in her voice.

"So...just one particle is potentially harmful? But...I've touched your blood before."

"Sure but like I said you'd need a large amount of it to find one particle. Plus my blood at the time had had it's white blood cells removed. I am all but certain that those would have saved Aunt May from reacting badly to the radioactive particle. Heck the ISO-36 might have even given her some kind of lasting affect which protected her although it wasn't like I was about to test that theory out.

And besides all that, I think the particle only affected her due to her severe age and the fact that she was so fragile in the first place."

MJ still looked a bit frightened and clearly needed more reassuring. Peter moved towards her and took hold of her hands, bringing them up to chest height.

"Seriously MJ, to absorb any radiation into your system from my blood you'd need to have touched a large amount of it...without gloves...and when you had a large enough openings in your skin for my blood to pass into it. I mean you wash your hands after you've touched my blood right? You haven't had any big cuts in your hands when you've touched it have you?"

MJ tilted her head slightly in thought.

"Well...I don't think so. I mean most of the time, that's just common sense when you touch anyone's blood."

Peter shook her hands up and down as if to shock the truth into her.

"Exactly! The chances of you having taken any radioactivity into your system by touching my blood are astronomically low and even if you had either the white blood cells would protect you or your own system would. I mean you aren't old or weak like Aunt May, you'd be fine. And..."

Peter looked downwards now, almost like an embarrassed child. His voice lowered slightly and he spoke more softly.

"If you weren't...if the radiation was going to harm you or _was_ harming you...I'd save you."

He squeezed MJ's hands slightly when he said this.

"You would?" MJ had arched an eyebrow and had adopted a similarly softer tone. Peter looked up now and it was he who was staring MJ dead in the eye now.

"Sure. Id' get you ISO-36 or something else. I wouldn't let anything like that happen to you MJ."

It was MJ's turn to give Peter's hands a little squeeze.

"I...I know. And...I suppose...I suppose if that happened to your aunt, and what with _your_ massive guilt complex...you wouldn't let me touch your blood if there was any danger."

"Of course I wouldn't."

Peter was still staring into MJ's eyes when he said this. Suddenly a flicker of realisation passed across his face, as if he had caught himself stepping out of line somehow. He broke the stare at the same time as he let go of her hands. He went back to his glass of water and picked it up in passing before leaning on the sofa again. After taking a quick sip, he adopted a friendly yet breezy tone.

"Look...if it's really worrying you I could test your blood myself I have the, equipment for it."

MJ for her part had stayed glued to the spot, unusually unsure how to react to the last few moments. Now though she gave her head a little shake as if to snap herself back to reality.

"Er, no that's-"

"Or I could take it to Curt Connors or Reed Richards. I see them both from time to time just to check the radioactivity in me is still okay. Plus I see them regarding all the strange stuff I'm exposed to because you can never be too careful. Heck remember how I told you about the alien costume Reed Richards helped me out with not that long ago. I'm sure they'd be willing to help..."

For whatever reasons (and MJ had a good idea which reasons in particular) Peter was talking slightly faster than normal and heading into a rambling territory, cutting off MJ before she finished speaking

"Umm , I said n-"

 _"...Or_ I could get some ISO-36 in, although I can't really afford it right now but as soon as I-"

 _"Peter!_ " MJ said, rather more loudly than normal. "I said no. You're smart. And responsible and...well... you're my friend. So when you say I'm okay...I trust you."

MJ had said this after her shoulders had dropped a little and she overall looked like her old relaxed self again. This seemed to calm Peter down a bit and he gave her a small nod accompanied by an even smaller smile.

"Thanks MJ...So...do...do you wanna do something tonight?"

MJ's eyes widened slightly and she turned her head inquisitively.

"What...What do you mean?"

"Oh you know. You wanna just hang out or go out or something?"

MJ didn't move for a split second before straightening her head and doing her best to suppress a flicker of disappointment.

"I dunno, its a little late." She said casually. "Maybe we should just watch a movie here?" Her eyes darted quickly to Peter's face when she said this but his expression remained neutral. "What you got?" She asked.

Peter went over to his TV and began examining some boxes scattered around it.

"Er, let's see. I have 'When Harry Met Sally', 'Friday the 13th' and...Godzilla..."

There was a long pause after he said this followed by an even longer one when he turned around to look at MJ. They exchanged a silent look of clear understanding.

"...Maybe we should just go out for dinner?" Suggested MJ

"I like that idea."

With that they headed out the door.


	2. Chapter 2: Squeeze

**_Peter Parker has faced trial and challenges which would have broken lesser men. But now the once Amazing Spider-Man seems to be struggling with the normalcy of a cramped subway. But what is the cause of his strife and how will he get through it?_**

 _This is sort of a follow-up to a very well known Spider-Man story that ran in Web of Spider-Man #31-32, Amazing Spider-Man #293-294 and Spectacular Spider-Man #131-132. I won't say it's name because it would spoil the story but check it out since the story rocks and if you want more information about what this story ties into._

 _My intention is that this story occurs shortly after Spectacular Spider-Man #132 and before Web of Spider-Man #33._

 _I really want to hear feedback to know what sucks and what doesn't so any would be appreciated._

* * *

A suitcase jabbed at his knee.

Bad breath wafted in his direction, fouling his nostrils.

Music blared in headphones so close he might as well have been wearing them himself.

It was rush hour on the New York subway, and Peter Parker wasn't happy.

As the train rattled along Peter and the other standing passengers swayed lightly.

The motion wasn't particularly turbulent.

Nevertheless, Peter gulped slightly.

He'd faced hordes of armed gunmen. He'd evaded impalement by lunatics dressed as rhinos and scorpions. He'd even been trapped under tons of rubble deep below the Hudson River. And yet the simple discomforts of the subway after five were making him feel anxious. It was absurd. This was nothing compared to what he'd seen, what he'd done and what he'd overcome in his career as the Amazing Spider-Man.

It all seemed so stupid, particularly since he didn't know why he felt like this.

Or at least...that's what he told himself...

That's what he tried to make himself believe...

As a scientist Peter knew a thing or two about problem solving. Whilst the mysteries of the human mind weren't exactly his forte, he was competent enough to work out why he was feeling this way.

It was for the same reasons why he'd felt similarly over the past few months. Whether he was waiting in a particularly busy line, stuck in a traffic jam en route to Aunt May's or amidst the hustle and bustle of the Daily Bugle, pangs of anxiety had suddenly hit Peter out of nowhere.

* * *

The train lurked forward as it stopped at a station. Peter found the other passengers pressing in closer to him as they were thrown off balance.

* * *

Against his will Peter's mind drifted back to the root of his recent problems. A root that could be summed up in a single name.

Kraven

* * *

Peter began to lightly sweat. Between the hot weather and the mass of people it wasn't unreasonable. But he knew that it had nothing to do with either.

* * *

Sergei Kravinoff.

Kraven the Hunter.

A big game hunter who lived by the law of the jungle. Many years ago as Spider-Man, Peter had tangled with him. He'd been a dangerous and cunning opponent back then and throughout their later encounters that hadn't changed much.

What had changed though was Kraven's state of mind. Though clearly a few bananas short of a bunch, Kraven's frequent defeats and his obsession with his 'honour' had led to him going way over the edge. He'd concocted an insane plan to pay Spider-Man back once and for all.

And so, one stormy night he'd stalked Spider-Man through the New York rooftops.

He ensnared him in a net.

Took out his rifle.

And fired.

But 'killing' Spider-Man was only the start. After having slain his hated foe Kraven proceeded to conduct a funeral for him.

He'd watched as the coffin was lowered into the ground.

He'd helped shovel the dirt and mud on top of it as he'd laid Spider-Man to rest.

He'd wept over a man whose face he'd never known.

But the horrible truth was...Peter...wasn't dead...

* * *

Deep down Peter desperately hoped that some of his fellow passengers would depart the train and give him some room to breathe. His stomach churned as he realised that hardly anyone was leaving the train...and that more people were climbing aboard.

* * *

Kraven had shot Peter with some kind of drug which put him into a deep state of sleep, something akin to suspended animation...or death.

Peter had been trapped in the coffin, buried six feet underground, boxed in on all sides and had been completely isolated...For two whole weeks.

* * *

The influx of new passengers was causing people near Peter to bunch up closer. Peter had to grip his handhold tightly to avoid falling on anyone who was lucky enough to have grabbed a seat.

Barely able to move, Peter began to lightly shake.

* * *

Peter had managed to free himself from the coffin when the effects of the drug had worn off. He'd struggled to walk, partially because of the muddy rain soaked ground, and partially because the lack of movement had made his muscles numb.

Even in the darkness of night, the brightness of the striking lightning had stung his eyes as they tried to adjust.

Seeking refuge in a church Peter had discovered newspapers detailing how 'Spider-Man' had been acting far more violently over the last two weeks. It hadn't taken Peter long to deduce what had happened.

Kraven.

He'd impersonated Spider-Man and ruined his reputation, all as part of some mad desire to 'prove' himself better than Peter. To prove that he wasn't just superior because he could _kill_ Spider-Man, but because he could _be_ Spider-Man.

And his masterstroke was leaving his enemy alive so that he'd _know_ that. So that Peter would _know_ Kraven had completely bettered him.

* * *

Peter suddenly felt very thirsty. He didn't have a drink of any kind on him, and even if he did he was squeezed in so tight that he wouldn't be able to reach it anyway.

* * *

Peter had gone to Kraven's townhouse to confront him.

He told himself he was just going to bring him in. But at the back of his mind he wanted to do more than that.

He wanted to beat him within an inch of his life. He wanted to tear him limb from limb. He wanted to make him _feel_ every ounce of the pain that Peter was feeling at that moment.

But Kraven had denied him that.

* * *

The pressure seemed relentless. Peter only wanted an inch or two of space but no one was able (or cared enough) to give it to him

* * *

When he'd impersonated Spider-Man, Kraven had captured a wretched specimen called Vermin. Vermin was an innocent man who'd been transformed against his will into a rat-like monster with an unfortunate taste for human flesh. Despite his actions Vermin was ultimately someone who needed help. But he received the opposite from Kraven.

After Kraven (disguised as Spider-Man) had beaten him senseless, he'd imprisoned Vermin within an electrified cage in his townhouse and proceeded to torture him. All this had served to make Vermin more violent and more dangerous than he already was, especially in regards to Spider-Man.

* * *

Another stop.

Another lurch.

Another moment where Peter would rather have been dodging bullets.

* * *

Kraven released Vermin and thus presented Peter with a simple choice.

Take the time to attack him, or go after Vermin?

Choose what he wanted, or what he knew was right?

Revenge or responsibility?

For Peter Parker there could never truly be a choice.

* * *

When he'd first gotten on the train Peter had given up his seat to a woman with a baby carriage. He knew that she needed the seat more than he did. At that moment though a hot flare of resentment flushed through him and he wished he'd never been so 'noble'.

* * *

So he'd pursued Vermin, intent upon going back to Kraven and settling thier unfinished business afterwards.

Little did he know at the time that he'd never get the chance. He'd never get his revenge. He'd never bring Kraven to justice. He'd never truly settle things.

Because as soon as Spider-Man had departed, Kraven had returned to his study, taken his prized rifle... and blown his own brains out.

* * *

Peter felt suffocated in his tiny corner of the carriage. He gulped again and then began to involuntarily take short sharp breaths which increased in speed.

* * *

It had happened then. It hadn't lasted as long as the times afterwards but it had been no less acute.

In the dark vestiges of the sewers Vermin called home, Peter had found himself crawling on his front doing his best to follow the creature.

He was fighting fatigue. He was fighting the stench. He was fighting the desire to go back and brutalise Kraven.

But Peter was also fighting his own fear.

The sewer, in all it's darkness and filth and confinement, was all too similar to Peter's 'home' from the previous two weeks.

A part of Peter didn't want to find Vermin.

A part of him wanted to run away.

In the end though Vermin had found him, commanding his rat minions to swarm on Peter and smother him.

* * *

More people flooded onto the train. What little space Peter had had was slipping away.

* * *

He'd fended off the rats but then Vermin had struck. He dragged Spider-Man down until he was completely submerged below the depths of the filthy water.

No.

Not submerged.

Buried.

* * *

His breathing continued to quicken. He tightened his grip on the handhold.

* * *

Peter had struggled beneath the water and eventually freed himself.

He proceeded to pummel Vermin. He didn't need to be so rough, but his fear had gotten the better of him.

He was never quite sure if it was fear or some kind of intuition which had caused him to run after Vermin seemed to get a second wind. Regardless he'd managed to lead Vermin up and out of the sewers into the bright morning light above.

Vermin couldn't take that. For him the cold darkness of his underground home was his sanctuary. In his own way he had been as afraid as Peter was.

Peter had handed him over to the authorities and then left. But the events of that night would never truly leave him, no matter how much he wanted them to.

* * *

The train moved off and the lights of the platform gave way to the darkness of a tunnel.

* * *

He was there again.

In the coffin.

In the darkness.

Barely able to move.

* * *

The music blared louder.

The pain in his knee grew more acute.

The stench of bad breath intensified.

* * *

He was banging desperately on the coffin lid, feeling the pressure on top of it.

He was screaming. Was he doing that out loud or within his own mind?

He wasn't sure.

* * *

Why couldn't he just get some space?

Why did they all have to be so close to him, squeezing him in from all sides?

They could show a bit of consideration couldn't they? A bit of compassion?

No. That wasn't going to happen. Peter could just tell by looking at thier faces.

* * *

He saw their faces.

Ned Leeds.

Captain Stacy.

Gwen.

Uncle Ben.

And everyone else he'd failed.

Everyone who'd paid the ultimate price.

Everyone he was going to join forever.

* * *

His throat was burning. He was so thirsty.

* * *

He wanted to leave. He didn't want to be down in the darkness among the dead men.

* * *

His stomach churned.

* * *

He was so scared.

He was so alone.

He was so tired

* * *

Why couldn't he just sit down for a minute?

* * *

How was he going to find the strength to escape?

* * *

His breaths grew shorter and faster. Like rapid fire.

* * *

The faces were so inviting.

* * *

His heart was beating faster. The pound of jungle drums.

* * *

It was so dark.

* * *

He closed his eyes and gritted his teeth.

* * *

So dark.

* * *

The music was so loud

* * *

So cold

* * *

He was drenched in sweat

* * *

So alone

* * *

Too many people

* * *

So many faces.

* * *

He couldn't move

* * *

So many people he'd let die.

* * *

No seats. No chance to rest.

* * *

He was so tired.

* * *

He had no strength.

* * *

He was trapped.

* * *

He was never going to escape.

* * *

He wasn't going to get any help.

* * *

He was-

* * *

He felt something on his hand.

A tight squeeze.

He looked at it and saw a smaller hand gripping his.

He turned to meet the green eyes of its owner.

"We're almost there tiger." Said Mary Jane.

She gave him a small smile.

Peter's breathing slowed.

His stomach settled.

He stopped sweating.

Suddenly he didn't feel all that tired.

Suddenly he didn't feel all that alone.

Suddenly he remembered what had driven him up and out of the darkness on that terrible night.

Or rather _who_.

He squeezed her hand right back.


	3. Chapter 3: Parentage Part 1

**_In Aunt May's attic Peter Parker uncovers secrets about his parents he'd rather have left buried_**

 _This fanfic is my own spin on the events of Amazing Spider-Man Annual #5 and #365-366 that dealt with Peter Parker's parentage._

 _Please leave a review as I am keen for feedback._

* * *

Peter coughed slightly as dust surrounded him.

"You alright up there dear?"

"I'm fine Aunt May!"

"Well don't do yourself an injury on my account."

"I won't!"

May had called Peter over in order to clear out the attic. She felt she'd accumulated quite enough junk over the years and wanted to make some room. Peter was more than willing to do it, but from his discussions with Mary Jane he also knew May had an ulterior motive which he was less than thrilled about.

As he continued this train of thought Peter began sifting through a pile of old bills in the attic.

Whilst it had been a good long while since her last health scare, May was on the wrong side of 80. Peter and MJ had deduced that her sudden urge to clear out the old Parker home in Forest Hills was not so she could fill it with any new worldly possessions she might acquire. Rather it was May's way of preparing for Peter and Mary Jane to fill it with _their_ possessions.

Peter continued through the bills now noticing they'd given way to some travelling documents.

Peter and MJ hadn't been married for very long but they'd tentatively discussed and fantasized about someday owning a place of thier own outside of the city; somewhere to raise a family. These had been pie in the sky plans given that they're income wasn't great and that they were far from trying to have kids any time soon. Nevertheless May had wanted the best for them, so Peter and MJ had not all that happily figured out May was either planning on handing the house over to them or was preparing for them to inherit it when her time came.

Peter vaguely registered that the travelling documents related to an awful lot of countries he was sure Aunt May and Uncle Ben had never visited.

Peter didn't discuss or like to think about May's mortality much. May, and her late husband Ben Parker had raised him since Peter's biological parents had died in a plane crash when he was very young. His feelings about his parents had been very conflicted throughout his life. On the one hand he had hardly known them and he couldn't have asked for better parents than May and Ben. But on the other, there was still a certain feeling of sadness and loss on the rare occasions when he did think about them.

He knew next to nothing about his mother, but Uncle Ben had told him his dad looked an awful lot like-

Peter's mind went blank. It was as if all the thoughts in his head had vanished at the sight of the document he had just come across. Printed on it was a tattered and frayed photograph of...himself.

 _What is this? I don't remember posing for a photo with a trench coat on?_

As he stared at the picture he began to notice a few things. A slightly differently sized nose, a mole or two out of place and (now that he looked closer) brown eyes.

 _But my eyes are blue._ He thought to himself.

Then it hit him.

 _Oh my God...This...This is my father._

It was very strange for Peter. He regarded Uncle Ben essentially as his father, but coming face to photo with the man who looked just like him, who WOULD have done all that Ben had done for Peter, stirred something inside of him. A part of him even felt guilty, as if this involuntary feeling was a betrayal of all the years Uncle Ben had dedicated to him. He knew that wasn't true though. He couldn't really explain what he was feeling but it was somewhere between curiosity and sadness.

Peter then noticed several more photos under his father's. Picking them up and examining them he saw another headshot of a young woman and a picture of her in a white dress and veil standing next to his father.

 _Mom?_

Peter had never seen any pictures of his mother before. She was beautiful and despite the faded colours of the photograph, Peter could see that he had inherited her blue eyes.

Peter grinned a little bit then bundled the photos up along with some other ones he noticed from the pile of papers. Heading down the attic hatch and then down the stairs he called out.

"Aunt May! MJ! Come see what I found!"

"What's up tiger?" Said MJ, as Peter entered the kitchen.

"I found some old photos of my parents!" Peter lifted up the pile of documents as he said this.

"You're parents?" MJ seemed mildly shocked. She knew even less about Peter's parents than he did and had rarely heard him mention them.

"Yeah. I haven't seen them much before. Where's Aunt May?"

"She just popped over to Aunt Anna's. Should we wait?"

"Nah, she'll be back soon enough. Check these out."

Peter sprawled the pictures onto the kitchen table. MJ picked up the headshot of Peter's father.

"Wow. He looks just like you Peter. What was his name again?"

"Richard. And here's one of my mom, Mary." Peter handed over his mother's picture.

"Hey she was quite the lookers! And she was a bit of a redhead too."

Peter turned to MJ and gave her a sly look. "Guess we Parkers like those." MJ shot him a warm smile and carried on sifting through the photos.

"Here's one of them in Paris, you can see the tower in the background. And I think they're in Egypt in this one."

"They sure did travel around. I found a stash of old travelling papers upstairs, they must have belonged to them."

"Did they travel for fun or was it all for work?"

"I dunno. I never knew what they did for a living. I'll ask Aunt May when she gets back."

"Huh? This one doesn't have them looking their best. They don't look too chipper. Nor does anyone else in the shot to be honest. And what's that weird logo behind them?"

"Let me see." Peter turned his head to the photo MJ was looking at. Peter's eyes widened and his blood chilled. Were it not for the logo MJ pointed out he might not have deduced who the other people in the photo were or why they and his parents had such serious expressions. The symbol was of a skull-like face with tentacles trailing off from it.

At that moment Aunt May walked through the door.

"Hello dears. You haven't been having any trouble with the-" May stopped and stared at the table covered in photos. "What are yo-Oh no! Don't look at those!"

May moved surprisingly fast for someone so old. But as she reached the table she knew it was too late. As Peter looked up he began to lightly stammer.

"Au-Aunt May...Why...Why were my parents in a photo with H.Y.D.R.A. agents?"

The absurdity of the statement, especially given the mundane surroundings and to whom he was talking to, only vaguely registered to Peter.

"Who or what is 'hydra'?" Asked Mary Jane. Peter straightened up and somewhat composed himself.

"They're...They're an elite terrorist group. International. They've been around since World War II."

May's hand reached up and she lightly clenched it. "Peter dear how do you know about those awful people?"

"I work at a newspaper Aunt May, I hear things". It was at least partially true. Peter had also encountered the organisation during his career as Spider-Man. "Aunt May please...please tell me why my parents are in a photo with these people?"

Aunt May moved towards a chair at the table. Rather than sitting in it she simply leant on it with both her arms and gripped it tightly.

"We...me and Ben that is...We didn't want to tell you the truth. We couldn't face it ourselves. It was why we put the photos of them away."

"What truth? What truth Aunt May?" Peter didn't want to sound agitated but he couldn't help it. Suddenly an awful lot of certainties had been thrown into doubt. Suddenly one of the people he loved most in the world, someone he trusted completely, was withholding something big from him and he wanted to know why.

"Peter...just...just sit down okay?" MJ placed a consoling hand on his shoulder. He felt himself relax slightly. He looked down and swallowed hard before doing as MJ asked.

MJ sat down next to Peter and took hold of his right hand which was lying on the table. Pushing the photo towards Aunt May with her other hand, she calmly said: "May...Can you explain this please?"

May stood there for a moment and during that moment Peter briefly worried that this might cause one of her fainting spells. But she simply slowly sat down herself and pulled in closer to the table. Placing her hand on the photograph she took a deep breath.

"You're parents met when they both worked for the government. Whenever we pressed them for details about thier work they began rather boring diatribes which we usually never remembered. One day after the plane crash a man came to this house and sat me and Ben down. He said he was from some kind of government organisation. S.H.I.E.L.D. I think he said. He told us that Richard and Mary were...infiltrators.

Yes, I think that was the word he used. They went to various countries and found thier way in with some very dangerous people, helping to bring them down from the inside."

"You...You're telling me my parents were like something out of James Bond?" Peter's eyes had widened, partially out of disbelief and partially out of scepticism.

"Peter why would I lie to you about this? And if I were, wouldn't you think I'd say something less fantastical?"

"I...So...they were infiltrating H.Y.D.R.A...They wanted to bring them down."

May closed her eyes and a very pained expression crossed her face.

"The man from S.H.I.E.L.D. said they were working off limited intelligence from Russia, that they had no real confirmation. But what they did have seemed to point to..."

"To what" The agitation in Peter's voice had been replaced now by a kind of desperate pleading. MJ squeezed his hand to somehow brace him or otherwise calm him down.

"To...to your parents being...traitors Peter..."

* * *

Much later, in the near darkness of their apartment, Peter was using his arm to lean up against a window staring into the lights of the city below. He heard a soft patter behind him but didn't break his stare. He only registered a reflection from the window in the corner of his eye as it slowly got bigger and bigger. Mary Jane put her hand on his shoulder again.

"Are you okay?" She asked quietly.

Peter mind flashed back to how, after their conversation, May had simply stood up and gone to bed. MJ had gone up and checked on her before coming back down. Without saying a word Peter had looked at her and made moves to leave. That had been four hours ago and he still hadn't said anything since. Now hearing MJ's words, half of him thought it was a stupid question but the other half wondered what else she could have said right then.

"No. Not really." He said this in a low monotone voice. He pressed his head against the window and as he continued his voice grew more and more lost.

"I just...I barely remember them MJ. All I have are a few photos and what Uncle Ben and Aunt May told me. I always had this image, this idea from what little I knew, that they were good people, people to be proud of. But now..." Peter clenched his fist. "Now I might not even have that. But that's just the thing...I _might_ not have that. If they're traitors, in the end I could live with it. I've lived with worse. But...I can't go on not knowing for sure. I _need_ to know the truth."

Slowly, MJ took her hand off of Peter's shoulder and walked away towards thier bedroom. Peter understood. MJ usually helped him with many of his problems. She's have an answer or at least a comforting word here and there. But what could she possibly say to this? What could she do? Peter just hoped that of the two of them, she at least would get a good night's sleep.

However, to his surprise he heard her behind him again a minute later.

"Tiger..." She said softly.

For the first time, Peter broke his gaze out the window and turned around to look at MJ. In her outstretched hand he saw her holding his Spider-Man costume. Firmly, and with a slightly fierce look in her eye she said:

"You go blow off some steam. I'll look up flights to Russia"

Peter stared for a second or two before taking the costume, his hand brushing against MJ's as he did so. Quietly, with a slight quiver he said:

"Thank you."

* * *

A week later Peter emerged from JFK airport and got a cab back to Forest Hills. During the journey he'd had plenty of time to think about what had happened since the day May told him about his parents.

He remembered how the night time swing had helped him clear his head a bit. He remembered how MJ was fretting about affording the flights to Russia, but only until Peter learned she was looking for two tickets. At that point Peter had made it clear he wanted to do this alone and reluctantly MJ had backed off (although Peter thanked her for wanting to come).

He remembered how in Russia, with the help of associates in S.H.I.E.L.D. and the Avengers, he had managed to infiltrate the H.Y.D.R.A. base there and bring them down. And most of all he remembered what he had confirmed about his parents...

Peter stepped out of the cab, paid the driver and walked up to the front door of the May's house. Curiously, despite having a key, he decided to ring the doorbell, as if to announce he was back and give everyone inside fair warning. MJ answered the door. He'd asked her to wait with May instead of meeting him at the airport. The result had evidently made her rather anxious.

"Hey." He said with a small smile. MJ for her part tired briefly to read that smile but it gave nothing away about his mood. So instead, without saying a word, she just hugged him.

When she let go a few seconds later she looked at him quizzically and with concern in her eye. "Well?" She asked.

"I'll tell you inside."

They moved into the kitchen where May was sitting at the very same table where they'd looked through the photos a week earlier. She looked up at him now, frightened but determined.

"Peter..."

Peter breathed in and out through his nostrils as if bracing himself. "In Russia me and Spider-Man made some contacts and met some people. With they're help we found out about my parents..."

"And...?" May asked slightly shaking.

"...They _were_ agents who worked for H.Y.D.R.A. They _did_ infiltrate other governments. They were regarded as traitors...But only because it was such a good cover."

May's eyes lit up suddenly as if she had heard good news but wanted to wait to make sure. "They were S.H.I.E.L.D. agents Aunt May. Double agents pretending to work for H.Y.D.R.A.

They were so covert that only the S.H.I.E.L.D. higher ups knew they were really on our side. If they revealed or risked revealing the truth to anyone, even you and Uncle Ben, then it would have compromised any of their other attempts to infiltrate H.Y.D.R.A.

H.Y.D.R.A. might even have tried to get revenge on them by targeting us. S.H.I.E.L.D. lied to us but for our own protection. They were innocent Aunt May...they were heroes."

May put her hand to her mouth as her eyes glistened with tears. MJ simply beamed. May got up from the kitchen and hugged Peter.

"Oh Peter, this is so wonderful! To have that burden lifted after all this time. To think that I hadn't misjudged them after all. If only Ben had..."

May paused. She was still smiling but there was sadness there too. Peter hugged her again.

"I know Aunt May...I know"

After they let go May wiped the tears from her eyes and clapped her hands together.

"Well there are going to be some changes around here now. To start with, we're going to put up those photos at last, now we've got nothing to be ashamed of."

Peter turned towards the door. "I'll get the photo frames from upstairs"

"No, no, no dear. I'll do that, you've had a long flight and besides I feel as if I could walk on air right now. I want to burn off this excitement"

"But..."

"No buts young man. You sit right down. And Mary Jane dear, if you could be so kind as to make some tea?"

MJ's smile got bigger. "Sure thing May"

As May scooted off upstairs Peter and MJ went to the cupboards to get the cups and teabags out.

"Feel better?" She asked.

"Much." Nodded Peter.

"So...You _did_ get it from somewhere."

Peter looked confused and turned to MJ. "Got what?"

She stopped and turned her head to face him flashing him another of her patented smiles. "Being a hero. Forget spider bites, it was always in your blood."

Peter smiled back. "Guess so. And now...now I can go ahead and remember them that way. Not as traitors and not as strangers either. Parents to be proud of."

"And someday...we could tell her the same about you."

Peter was back to being confused. "Tell who what?"

"That her daddy was a hero...someone to be proud of."

Peter's face tentatively lit up. "You're not..."

MJ giggled a little. "No. But like I said, someday we might be. Someday we _will_ be."

Peter grinned as he leaned over and kissed Mary Jane.

"Who says it'll be a girl?" He whispered afterwards.

"Aunt May. 'Woman's intuition' she called it." She whispered back.

"Well then I guess it'll be a girl." Said Peter, before kissing her again.

* * *

Meanwhile May had found the photos as well as a few small frames and was descending the stairs with them tucked under one arm. The doorbell rang again.

"Now who could that be?" She muttered to herself. More audibly she called out to the kitchen. "Don't worry I'll get it."

May opened the door and dropped the photos and the frames as her hands leapt up to cover her mouth. Hearing the frames smash, Peter and MJ stopped what they were doing and quickly strode into the hallway and towards the front door.

"Aunt May! What..."

They froze at the sight in the doorway. May shakily stood back and to the side of the door allowing it to open up more and fully reveal the visitors. Standing in the doorway, as if in a strange funhouse mirror of where Peter and MJ were standing now were a man and a woman in about thier late forties or early fifties. Though there were lines on her face, the woman was still quite attractive and one could tell she would have been stunning when she was younger, what with her red tinged hair. The man on the other hand was more wrinkled but it was strangely fitting for him. His hair was slightly rescinding and had patches of grey on the sides just above his ears. If Peter were staring into a funhouse mirror then, apart from anything else, it would've been rather strange because this mirror changed the colour of his eyes. The man spoke slowly with a small and sad smile:

"Hello Peter...Hello son."


	4. Chapter 4: Parentage Part 2

_**Peter Parker's parents have shown up out of the blue alive and well. How will he react?**_

 _Please leave a review as I am keen for feedback._

* * *

The living room was silent.

Only the sound of an old clock on Aunt May's shelf (and possibly a pin dropping) could be heard.

There were three pieces of furniture in the living room. One sofa for two in front of the window which faced out onto the street, another three seater up against the wall where the living room door was, and an armchair parallel to the first sofa. Despite this, the large three seater was all but vacant leaving a kind of no-man's land in between the other sofa and the armchair.

Richard and Mary Parker were sitting in the sofa whilst Peter had sat himself in the armchair. Mary Jane for her part was leaning on the arm of the largest sofa. Richard, Mary and Mary Jane were all stealing quick glances at one another, and sometimes giving small polite smiles and even smaller nods.

Peter though was just staring straight ahead at his parents, his gaze never wavering. He was wearing a poker face which nonetheless betrayed a hint of displeasure. To an outside observer it might have seemed Peter was staring at the older couple as though they were doing something rather rude and didn't have the good manners to stop.

After a few more glances and nods, Richard decided to break the tension. He leaned forward in his seat with his arms on his knees and turned towards MJ's direction.

"I'm, er, sorry miss, we didn't catch your name."

Uncharacteristically, MJ looked a tad awkward and slightly flustered.

"Oh, um... I'm, I'm Mary Jane."

Mary suddenly smiled encouragingly.

"Oh. That's similar to my name." She said in a polite and quiet voice.

MJ briefly smiled. "Yeah...guess it is..." Her voice had quietly trailed off with the last few words, once again betraying the awkwardness of the situation.

The group returned to the silence. This time it lasted for only a minute, but again it was Richard who broke the tension by once more addressing Mary Jane. However his polite and casual remarks were also directed at Peter this time.

"...So...how...how do you two know each other?"

Peter's voice was flat and his expression never wavered:

"She's my wife." He said curtly.

Richard and Mary's expressions changed to ones of shock when they heard this. Thier voices however didn't raise an iota.

"You're...oh, we, we certainly have missed out an awful lot." Said Mary, again in her polite quiet voice.

"Yes, last time we saw you, you were barely able to crawl." Richard had smiled and given a small laugh when he said this, evidently thinking they were making some slight headway. Peter's continued flat tone told a different story.

"I got a lot better at that."

The smiles on Richard and Mary's faces wiped away. They looked deferring at Peter

"Well, well yes of course. I just meant..."

At that moment Aunt May bustled into the living room with a tea tray.

"Here we are. Now get them while they are still hot. Richard I remember how you liked yours without milk and Mary is the same. Mary Jane dear I think this that earl grey stuff you said you said you grew a taste for on that trip to London. And Peter, you're sure you don't want anything?"

Peter looked up at Aunt May and for a second he felt like a child again looking up to her for...for what?

He wasn't sure.

Comfort?

 _No._ He thought. _Guidance._

But he saw nothing there but a smiling old face. A face he could tell was as lost as he was and was dealing with this in the only way she knew how: by pretending everything was normal. Seeing this Peter just slowly shook his head. Out of the corner of his eye he saw MJ's worried expression as her mouth slightly open and her hand twitched. But she thought better of it and didn't do anything in the end.

"Er...thank you May." Said Richard "You remembered how I liked i-" He stopped as he tasted the tea. An expression of deep satisfaction passed over his face and after he swallowed he sighed deeply.

"I...I never thought it would taste quite that good."

Mary put her hand on Richard's and squeezed it a little bit. Seeing that Peter's mind briefly recalled Mary Jane doing something similar when Aunt May told him about his parents the week before. Right at that moment though, that seemed like years ago.

"Well it has been over twenty years so I suppose I've gotten much better at brewing." May's statements might have been funny if Peter and MJ didn't know she was saying them sincerely as if all this was normal.

"Was the tea rotten where you were staying dear?" She continued.

"I...you could say that..." Said Richard. He was about to take another sip when he looked round the room and decided not to. He put his cup down and leaned forward again, clasping his hands in between his knees.

"I suppose...I suppose you are all wondering just where we have been and, well...why we're here now."

No one answered but it wasn't as if they had to for Richard to continue.

"You didn't know this about us May...nor you Peter. We weren't allowed to tell anyone, even family. Mary and I met when we were secretly working for S.H.I.E.L.D. We were tasked with infiltrating the terrorist group H.Y.D.R.A. and bringing them down from within. Unfortunately that involved us pretending to certain authorities that we were either genuine H.Y.D.R.A. agents or traitors. Because of our jobs we weren't able to spend much time with you Peter but we knew Ben and May would look after you in between missions."

"And besides we were getting close to shutting H.Y.D.R.A. down and going into less hazardous work domestically." Chimed in Mary.

"That's right. When we left for that last time it was supposed to be our final H.Y.D.R.A. mission. We'd gotten close to the man in charge of their Russian base and with one more trip we'd know everything we needed to. Unfortunately...our cover had been blown. Somehow they found out about us. They're agents had disguised themselves as passengers on our plane and hijacked it. They threw us out with parachutes before they blew up the plane, making it look like we'd been killed. They took us back to Russia, to a smaller base where we were kept prisoner. They tortured us for years to extract the information we knew but we never said a word. Thier leader felt that it would be crueller to just let us rot than simply kill us so we were kept there for years. But recently Spider-Man brought the Russian H.Y.D.R.A. base down with S.H.I.E.L.D.'s help. S.H.I.E.L.D. were looking through the base and they found us. They debriefed us and sent us on our way. And...here we are."

"We came straight back to where we had left. We came straight back to our family. We...we were so sorry to hear about Ben..." Mary squeezed Richard's hand again. "With his age in all honesty we weren't sure either he or you May would still be around. But it still was a hard blow."

"We're still dealing with it. But at least you're still around May. And looking as lovely as ever if I dare say."

"Oh you flatterer" Giggled May, who still was plainly in denial about the whole thing.

"And you Peter. Look at you. You've become a man now."

"A married man" Corrected Mary as she smiled at Mary Jane, who awkwardly smiled back.

"Sorry, a _married_ man. Me...Me and your mother are so happy to see you son and...we can't wait to be a family again."

They both smiled at him now, warm, inviting smiles.

"Excuse me I need to take a walk"

With that Peter got up and strode out of the living room and towards the front door, grabbing his jacket from the hook as he went. He'd left so abruptly the front door had slammed shut before anyone could say or do anything. MJ nevertheless quickly got up and went out the door herself.

By the time she was out the door and down the steps leading to it Peter was several houses down and not walking at a particularly relaxed pace. MJ employed a light jog to catch up to him and called out whilst she did so.

"Peter! Peter wait!"

Peter stopped sharply, but only to try and zip up his jacket in the cold weather. When MJ caught up with him his head was bowed in concentration. He was evidently struggling with his jacket, unable to zip it up. He gave a quiet little laugh.

"Heh. Guess we wasted our money MJ. My parents would've come to _us_ if we'd waited."

There was a kind of cynical smile on Peter's face when he said this. He was also slightly gritting his teeth as he continued to struggle with his jacket. As comfortingly as she could manage MJ tried to reach him.

"Peter...I can't imagine how your feeling right now-"

Peter gave up on the coat, and turned to half yell at MJ. In what almost seemed like on breath he finally vented.

"I don't know how to feel! Suddenly they're people in my life who I'm supposed to love and I...I don't...How can I? I don't even know who they are!"

MJ took a tiny step back but continued unperturbed. "Peter they're your parents. They're your family."

Peter continued to vent, gesticulating towards Mary Jane, May's house and other random directions as he did so.

"No, _you're_ my family. Aunt May is my family. Those people in there happen to be related to me. That doesn't mean anything. Not when they were never there for me. Where were they when Flash was beating me up at school? Where were they when I graduated Collage? Where were they when I got married? Where were they all those times I needed them huh? Off playing spies! For all my life MJ! All my life!" His voice started to break with those last words and MJ could tell how much he really was hurting; how much he was fighting back the tears. She adopted a quiet and sensible tone and tried (again) to be understanding; but not just to Peter this time.

"They've explained all that Peter. It wasn't their fault, you're being too hard on them."

Peter looked up at the sky before fixing his gaze back onto MJ; that cynical smile was back again. He addressed her snidely, almost like he was mocking her.

"Yeah: 'them'. Who's to say they even are my parents? How's anyone supposed to know what they look like now after so many years?"

MJ knew Peter didn't mean to be this vaguely rude to her. All the same she felt she best deflate his attitude, so quietly, like a parent talking to their child, she spoke to him again.

"I...I don't know Peter...I just know that if they aren't your parents do you really want to leave Aunt May alone with them? And if they are...do you really want to spend your time playing hero and running away instead of getting to know them?"

That did wipe the cynical look off Peter's face. Now he looked serious and cagey.

"I'm not running away" He said, lightly shaking his head.

"Then why're you out here now?" MJ had crossed her arms and shrugged her shoulders as she asked this.

"...I wasn't going to suit up"

"Yes you were. Whenever there's something really upsetting you, you put on a mask and lose yourself in it for awhile. I speak from experience. But not this time tiger. May needs you...and maybe those two people in there too."

Peter looked down at the ground. MJ couldn't see his face but she imagined it was halfway between a look of slight shame and that of a lost little boy. She tilted her head slightly as if to peer up at his downward face.

"We can go in together if you want."

Peter lightly nodded.

MJ gently took his hand and lead him back to the house.


	5. Chapter 5: Back in the Swing of it

_**After five years on the road, he didn't want to get involved. But when a certain 'lethal protector' starts causing trouble in his home city Ben Reilly must swing into action once again.**_

 _This story is my take on events from early on in the Clone Saga, specifically the Power and Responsibility and Exile Returns arcs._

* * *

I'd been on the road for five years. Five years in exile, carving out a name, an identity, a life from nothing.

All the while being tormented by the thoughts and memories of a man who had all that and more. The man who I knew felt like the whole world was against him. He didn't know how lucky, how truly blessed he was.

At least he was part of the world, not like me. I belonged nowhere. I wasn't even supposed to be alive. Heck I shouldn't have existed in the first place.

I'd been a tool. An experiment…A clone…

But then I'd found myself back in New York City. Aunt May was sick. Really sick. And no one knew exactly how much time she had left. If there was anything I could do or if this was my last chance to see her, even if it was just from a distance, I had to take the chance.

See…she wasn't my aunt. I had never been a child. I'd never grown up. May Parker had never packed my lunch for me every day before school. She hadn't hugged me whenever I was scared or hurt. She'd never been there for me like a mother throughout my life.

But she'd been there for him.

He remembered all those things.

He loved her.

Which meant….I did too.

Despite everything….she was still _my_ aunt. I couldn't _not_ be there for her at a time like this.

But then things got complicated.

I met _him_ ….Peter Parker. And he did not take kindly to someone running around with his face, thoughts or feelings. I couldn't blame him. I'd have felt the same way. I mean how would _you_ have liked to come face to face with proof that everything that makes you unique can just belong to someone else? That you can just be copied and mass produced?

We went our separate ways but during our encounter he made it clear he wanted me gone; or maybe worse. I was half willing to oblige but I was determined to stay for Aunt May's sake, whether she got better or not.

Then as I got myself a place I saw things, things which I knew Peter would deal with if he'd seen them. Muggings. Assaults. Accidents. People who needed Spider-Man's help.

I intervened whenever I saw them, just as I had during my time on the road. But like those lonely years spent travelling, I kept telling myself they were a series of isolated incidents. Just one offs, exceptions. I couldn't stand by and let people get hurt but I wasn't going to _look_ for trouble either.

That was until I encountered a black and white nightmare too big to ignore.

Venom.

I didn't know all the details about who or what he was, but I'd kept abreast of the news enough to know he was bad news. He was some kind of super powered nut job who somehow wound up with his own take on a slick black suit Peter sported years ago; with Peter's powers to match.

A lunatic with Peter's powers (with my powers) going unchecked in the city? It should've been Peter's problem. But he wasn't around. He wasn't going to stop Venom.

And as much as I told myself otherwise, if Peter wasn't going to shoulder this responsibility…then that made it _my_ responsibility _._

I'd left the city all those years ago with a costume of my own. It'd been identical to Peter's but over the years I hadn't taken the best care of it. The gloves and the mask were okay but the rest of it was long gone. The web-shooters were another story. I'd kept those, even tinkered with them. But I couldn't go out with just those and my street clothes. I didn't have too many clothes to begin with!

But I had been working on a little something over the years. It had been an indulgent weakness. It was a simple red spandex suit and mask. Something to use in an emergency I told myself. But I knew that wasn't true. I knew I'd worked on it whenever I felt really homesick or low. It was so stupid but in making it and keeping it near me it'd made me feel better sometimes.

Well now it was much more than that. And yet it still needed a little something. I tried to justify my childishness to myself. After all it _was_ cold in the city at that time of year. I might as well have been comfortable whilst I risk life and limb right? And if I happened to find what I needed in the spider section of the Natural History Museum's gift shop, well what could it hurt?

With that, I was finally ready. I went to the roof of my apartment building, determined to find and stop Venom before he did any more damage.

Standing on the edge of the building I looked down. I'd never been afraid of heights, yet staring over the edge of the ledge I felt nervous. I wasn't sure if I could do this, though that scientist brain of mine was assuring me that there was no logical reason I couldn't.

My motor functions would still be there. The web-shooters defiantly still worked. And my spider sense could help me if I really needed it to. I'd be fine.

Despite all that I was trembling as I stretched out my arm, turned my wrist, pressed my two middle fingers to the trigger in the palm of my glove and tapped twice. The web jetted out just like it was supposed to. The web hit it's mark and I grabbed the line tight.

Taking a deep breath I looked down again…and leapt over the edge.

I'd come to this city and put on this costume all out of necessity. I'd done it because I felt I _had_ to more than because I _wanted_ to. I was determined to stop, to leave, as soon as my business was concluded.

But as I fell, as I began to instinctivly manoeuvre my body so that my fall became a swing and I felt the inertia of my defying of gravity, I discovered I had a big problem.

Because, my God…how could I ever stop this?

How could _anyone_ stop this if they knew what it was like? But no one could possibly know. How could anyone even begin to imagine how this felt?

Soaring dozens of stories high at God only knows what speed.

Knowing there is only a one thin thread strand between you and the pavement.

Feeling the adrenaline flare in you in that half second when you let go of your line and are suspended in mid air before gravity kicks in.

And then two quick taps to your palm, a small click, a slight shake on your wrist, a glint from a shining strand, and finally a tug on your arm as the web anchors, and you're safe again.

You're flying through the air, the wind rushing past you through the concrete canyons of the greatest city on Earth.

I wanted to look for Venom. That's what I intended to do. That was my responsibility. But I didn't look very hard. I couldn't help myself.

Was it just some fun? Maybe to anyone who'd been watching me. But the truth is it was so much more than that.

For the first time in too long I felt…whole. Like I'd been reunited with a limb I'd lost. Like I could breathe again.

This was different from using my powers on and off whilst on the road. Garbed in the costume, the mask covering my face, swinging from a web, in **_this_** city…my city….my home. Nothing before could compare to it. Nothing.

It was almost like the first time I-no, the first time _Peter_ , had ever swing from a web.

Except I knew fifteen year old 'Puny Parker' had never felt exactly as I felt at that moment. The excitement and thrill of discovering what web swinging for the first time couldn't compare to the sensation of _re_ -discovering it as I was.

To come back to a part of yourself after so long, a part you'd tried to deny. To defy yourself and the whole damn world for _ever_ forbidding you from being what you were _born_ to be. To rejoice in being _Spider-Man_ again!

In my memories I'd always remembered being Peter. I'd remembered how by the time the Shea Stadium incident happened he'd grown so used to web-swinging it was second nature. It wasn't much of a thrill.

Five years away from it and _I_ certainly wasn't taking it for granted. And I knew I never, ever would.

I'd secretly longed and dreamed to do this again, and hated myself for it.

I tried to tell myself that wasn't me.

That person who felt free as he flew through the air above everyone and everything in the whole world was another man.

Well…to _Hell_ with that!

Peter Parker or not.

Spider-Man or not.

Man or not.

This was _me._

Ben Reilly.

Deal with it world!


	6. Chapter 6: Family Planning

**_After a pregnant Mary Jane endures a serious health scare, Peter Parker seeks out Seward Trainer for some answers. This is a Clone Saga related story._**

 _This story is set during the Spider-Man comics published during the mid 1990s, specifically the Clone Saga. This story occurs sometime after Spectacular Spider-Man #229 and before Spider-Man: The Final Adventure #1. This is sort of my attempt to explain some things that happened in Spec #229 as well as the MC2 universe if you want to look at it that way._

 _Please leave a review as I am keen for feedback._

* * *

Peter strolled into the lab of Seward Trainer. He wasn't exactly in a good mood; but he was in a determined one. You didn't mess around when it came to things like this.

Recently Peter had been overjoyed to learn that his wife Mary Jane was pregnant. However his life had been turned upside down upon his learning that he was a clone of the original Peter Parker, created by the madman known as the Jackal a.k.a. Miles Warren, his old college professor. Peter had come close to the edge when he heard that and had even gone over it to some extent. He seethed at himself over the horrible memory of when he first heard the news.

It wasn't the moment he knew for certain that he was a clone which hurt. It was the rage which had engulfed him. The months before that day had put him through a series of traumatic events any one of which alone would have broken a lesser man. His best friend Harry had died. He'd lost his parents a second time. His aunt had entered a coma and then died not long afterwards. He'd been accused of murder, and a host of other traumas large and small seriously affected him as well. As such hearing he was a clone had been the straw which broke the camel's back and Peter had just snapped.

He viciously attacked his clone Ben Reilly.

 _No_. He thought. _I'm the clone. Ben is the original Peter Parker. I have to get used to that fact_.

In the attack he'd been so consumed by his rage that it blinded him to his surrounding, he had become utterly unaware of everything surrounding him save for Ben. It was during that rage, and during his blanking out of his surroundings that it had happened.

Mary Jane had instinctively tried to stop Peter and had placed her hand on his arm for just a second. He was told later she'd been screaming at him to stop but, again, his rage had served to deafen him to his surroundings.

His spider enhanced reflexes and strength conspired with his rage to make him simply react without thinking with astonishing speed and he'd flung his arm out, knocking Mary Jane into a wall without realising what he'd done or even that it had been her who was behind him.

Peter intellectually knew that he genuinely hadn't realised she was there...but that didn't stop him from feeling guilty. Of hating himself for that moment more than he had hated any of the villains who'd tried to hurt him or his loved ones over the years.

That had been bad enough but not long afterwards Mary Jane had fainted and been rushed to hospital. The doctors had said her condition was critical (although he also found out she had been standing up and walking around afterwards which made him question their judgment) and it was all because of traces of radioactivity in her bloodstream. Those were having an adverse affect alongside the normal hormonal changes in her pregnancy and so both her life and the baby's had become endangered.

Ben's friend Seward Trainer, a geneticist and confidant to the Parkers, had been examining Mary Jane beforehand and had detected genetic anomalies. He'd given the baby the all clear but when MJ fell ill he showed up on Ben's request with a good idea of what had happened. He had explained that MJ's condition was even worse than he had anticipated and had explained it had been one of several possibilities. As such he had prepared an antidote and not told the Parkers since alarming them would have served no purpose.

After a crisis involving Trainer's super villain daughter (Lady Octopus) had served to prevent the antidote from getting to the hospital, Peter and Ben suited up as Spider-Man and the Scarlet Spider and eventually retrieved it. In the process Peter had decided to give up life as Spider-Man and handed the mantle over to Ben. MJ was doing fine but now Peter wanted some answers and only Trainer could give them to him.

"Hey Pete." Said Ben.

 _Oh...I didn't know he'd be here_ thought Peter. He didn't know why he'd imagine he'd find Trainer alone. Ben was something like a son to Trainer so it was only natural that in seeking out one you might encounter the other.

"Hi Ben. What's up?"

Ben was carrying a large box and put it down.

"Nothing much. Just helping Trainer shift some of this equipment"

"I'd do it myself but I can't lift 10 tons over my head." Peter turned to the right where Trainer was emerging out of a room. "Hello there Peter. What brings you here? Is everything alright with Mary Jane?"

"She's fine Seward. The baby's fine as well but...it's about what happened at the hospital recently"

"Oh yes?" Trainer raised an eyebrow. "What about it?"

"You see I...I..." Peter decided to leave manners to one side and simply be direct. "Trainer...I want to know _exactly_ how those radioactive traces got into my wife's blood."

Seward inhaled and then exhaled slowly through his nostrils. "I think Peter...what you're really asking is...did they came from you?"

As Ben looked from Trainer to Peter and back again, Peter stared Trainer dead in the eyes then exhaled himself.

"...Yes. MJ and me are usually careful whenever she touches my blood. We know it's radioactive but it can't hurt you unless it gets into your system and I've never given her a blood transfusion or anything like that. Heck whenever she touches my blood she either wears gloves or makes sure she hasn't got any openings in her skin so no blood could get in. Not that if it did it's likely to transfer any radioactivity. The radiation is so sparse that you're need a whole transfusion's worth to transfer even a particle to someone and-"

"...And even if a particle got in, her body would deal with it or the white blood cells from your blood would address the problem." Cut in Trainer. "Yes I know all that Peter, we have discussed this. I know that just like I know how, from time to time, you check out the radioactivity in your blood to ensure there aren't any worrying changes-"

"...And check out MJ from time to time too, just to make sure there is no radioactivity her either." This time Peter cut in. "If I had even seen a tiny amount of radioactivity I would've taken steps to make sure there wasn't even the possibility of her getting harmed. I'd have gotten ISO-36 or taken her to see Reed Richards or someone else, even if it'd expose my identity. I mean she gets screened for cancer every now and then anyway, just to be sure; she did used to smoke after all."

Peter turned his whole body to directly face Trainer now and he slightly clenched his fists too. "So you tell me Trainer...how did the radioactivity get in there? Did...did you know about it?"

Trainer's expression didn't waver but he did decide to walk around the room a little bit whilst he began to talk. "Not as such. I'd examined Ben enough times to know about his radioactive blood and your wife was lightly insisting I run radiation checks. I would have done so any way, or at least I would've checked her blood in the first place. Blood tests are relatively standard procedure for most pregnant women. Not only does it give you an idea of the mother's health but it allows you to prepare for any possible problems like if the mother or the child is rhesus negative."

"Yeah yeah I know all about that" Peter said impatiently.

"Er...I don't." Said Ben, sounding stupider than he actually was.

"You don't?" Peter was surprised. Ben was a scientist like him, how could he not know about rhesus negative?

"Well I'm not the expectant father; I haven't read up on this stuff. What the heck is rhesus negative?

Peter mentally checked himself. Ben and he might share the same memories but Peter had been given the luxury of completing his education and as someone hoping for kids (which Ben hadn't considered when he believed Peter had been the original) he'd obviously read up on this stuff.

Trainer stopped his little walk and turned to address Ben. "Rhesus negative is a particular quality in the blood of a minority of people. Often if mothers possess this quality and are exposed to rhesus positive blood their bodies' create antibodies which fight against the rhesus positive blood. The danger being that in rare instances where a baby's and it's mother's blood mixes the mother's own body will fight against the baby. It's normally not a problem and only a danger if there is a second pregnancy where the baby's blood is again rhesus positive. There is a simple treatment to deal with it which neutralises that element in the baby's blood. Without that treatment the mother's body can attack the baby as a pathogen and thereby endanger it's life and potentially the mother's as well. It's all because in an odd way a baby is a kind of parasite as far as the mother's body is concerned. But certain hormones dictate that the mother's body _doesn't_ harm the baby."

Peter's impatience was rearing it's head again now. "Thanks for that lecture. But can we get back on topic please?"

"Oh sorry." Said Trainer looking slightly embarrassed. "Well I checked out Mary Jane's blood and found no radioactive traces within it. Even if I had, don't you think I would have told you, or her, or even Ben here about it to keep you vigilante should anything happen? Don't you think I would have gotten some of that ISO-36 to neutralise the radiation or given her the antidote as soon as I developed it?"

There was a twinge of hurt in Trainer's voice. Maybe it was the idea of his professionalism being questioned? But Peter suspected it was more a bit more personal than that. Nevertheless Peter pressed on.

"But at the hospital you said you knew MJ's life was going to be endangered."

"No, I said it was a possibility. I was referring to the minute possibility that the baby would have radioactive blood like you and that the blood might intermingle with the Mary Jane's. Usually that can't happen except in exceptional circumstances. However Mary Jane has not necessarily been...handled, as gently as she perhaps ought to have been so there was a possible risk of her's and the baby's blood intermingling."

That now all too familiar self-hatred seethed within Peter for a second.

"On top of that those genetic anomalies I detected initially in the pregnancy might have altered the nature of the pregnancy from a normal human one so that it may well be possible for the mother and baby's blood to intermingle. Remember Peter when it comes to this sort of thing we are in uncharted territory. Apart from you and Ben here no one else possesses your unique abilities and no one else has attempted to pass them on to the next generation. Your child and Mary Jane's _are_ the precedent. The trend setters if you will."

Curiously Peter didn't feel like much of a pioneer.

"I still don't understand why you didn't warn us about this?"

"As I said at the hospital it would have served no purpose. You and Mary Jane were going through a hard enough time as it was. I didn't want to make you needlessly worry about something which was a remote possibility and only one of several _other_ possibilities. I prepared the antidote secretly and vowed to only use it if necessary."

"You should have told us!"

Peter didn't mean to raise his voice like that and Ben inched a little bit towards Trainer. Trainer though was stone faced.

"Perhaps." He said deadpan. "But imagine it like it was rain"

"What?" Peter and Ben said in confused unison.

"Imagine it was like rain. Imagine that there are two people you want the best for, two people who've had a very hard time of it lately and have been living in apprehension about bad weather."

"A-are you being serious?" Peter asked. He was somewhere between confused, incredulous and annoyed. Trainer shrugged

"Sorry, this is the best analogy I can come up with."

Peter turned to Ben who shrugged himself.

"Just hear him out Pete." With an eyebrow raised Peter turned back to Trainer and gave a small nod, indicating that he should continue.

"Ahem. Where was I? Ah yes. So these two people have been living in fear over possible bad weather but they are pleased to learn that the forecasts expect clear skies and sunshine for the foreseeable future. And after even more hard times those two people want nothing more than to simply go out and enjoy the sunshine. But the man who told them about the good weather is all too aware that there is a highly remote possibility that the weather might turn. Would you then insist to them to take an umbrella? Or would you not simply naturally keep one on standby, ready to give it to those people when and if the weather turns? It wasn't like I sent you and Mary Jane out blindly when the sky was dark with rainclouds Peter."

Peter looked sceptical, but decided to move on to another question worrying him.

"If the radiation in essentially harmless in small enough doses, why did it harm Mary Jane?"

Trainer answered almost methodically.

"To correct you for a moment Peter, it wasn't the radioactive traces themselves which were harming Mary Jane. She was harmed by her normal hormonal changes reacting adversely due to their presence. Mary Jane had heightened hormonal activity in her body due to her pregnancy. The radiation in her blood stream was not harmful in and of itself and her body easily produced antibodies to it which kept her safe. However her body identified the source of the radiation as the foetus and so the hormones kicked her immune system into overdrive and tried to harm the baby which had a knock on affect upon Mary Jane endangering both of their lives.

My antidote utilised aspects of ISO-36 to neutralise the radioactive traces in Mary Jane's bloodstream and also within the baby itself. It also introduced another chemical which stopped her immune system from attacking the baby and it 'turned off' the chromosome inside the baby which generated the radiation in it's blood in the first place."

"How could it generate radiation though? I'm no expert but I know enough about biology to know that we get most of the things our body needs from what we eat. That's how we have iron in our bodies; we compose it from the various foods we eat. It's not like we directly eat the metal itself. So how could Mary Jane or the baby generate radiation if they aren't eating uranium or something?"

Trainer paused for a while and rubbed his beard whilst looking downwards in thought.

"That I am not sure about to be honest. But we already know the radiation in your and Ben's blood is not like more common forms of radiation. Perhaps it self-generates or uses other chemical compounds to generate itself. After all you and Ben both possess radioactive blood so there is a case for it being generated organically since you were grown from Ben's DNA Peter. And I doubt Warren would've introduced radiation himself into his clones.

In any case, there shouldn't be any more radiation coming from the foetus and we'll be vigilante from now on to ensure it doesn't happen again. I'll even tell you how to create the antidote yourself if you want Peter or simply make more for you."

"Um...yeah...thanks Seward." Peter lowered his head. He had all his answers now. His wife and child were healthy, and what passed for his faith in Seward had been restored. And yet there was something deeper which still troubled him. Ben couldn't figure it out, but Trainer saw it in Peter. It was a concern he could recognise as an older man who had been young and full of hopes for the future once. He moved forward and placed a hand on Peter's shoulder and spoke firmly but with a consoling element to his voice.

"Peter please listen to me. What happened to Mary Jane was not your fault. Every pregnancy carries risks. But the rewards if all goes well are...well they are worth it."

He lowered his eyes for a moment.

"I was simply too damn stupid to see that when I was your age."

Peter looked up and his and Ben's eyes met for a moment. They both knew Trainer was referring to his own daughter and the miserable job he did as a father to her. Trainer's eye raised and he straightened up his posture slightly, as if this would give his words more authority.

"So don't you worry too much about letting MJ touch your blood, and don't feel like this means you shouldn't have another baby if you want to. There are many possibilities for conceiving a child with your unique genetics. Some are dangerous some are not. Even this scenario was highly unlikely. I wasn't expecting with any certainty the baby would generate radiation due to having your genetic coding. It may well be a recessive gene the next baby won't inherit at all. Just be careful and do your best. And if this happens again, well you have the antidote now don't you?"

Peter gently nodded his head

"Thanks Trai- Seward"

"Parenthood, like life, doesn't come with a rule book Peter. There are always risks no matter what and all any of us can do is our best and take it one day at a time."

"One day at a time...but that doesn't mean I can't prepare for the future..."

"Excuse me?"

An odd distant look had crossed over Peter's face as if a light bulb in his head hadn't so much just turned on, but was slowly but surely getting brighter and brighter as an idea formed.

"Seward, you've got connections in the scientific world right?"

"That I do. Yes."

"Do you know of a company called General Techtronics?"

Ben's eyes widened and his head tilted to the side as he locked eyes with Peter and gave him a quizzical stare. Seward however simply rubbed his bearded chin again and looked upwards in thought.

"Hmmm...yes...yes I do. I'm afraid they aren't around anymore though."

"Oh..." Peter did his best to cover up his disappointment. Trainer's expression though didn't change at all.

"Yes, there was a merger and they are called Garrid now. Why do you ask?"

Peter's eyes lit back up.

"Garrid. Alright." He said more to himself than Seward or Ben. "Seward do you think you could maybe get my foot in the door there?"

Trainer looked surprised. "At Garrid? Probably, but you'd still need to lobby hard for a position. Competition is tough even for someone as skilled as you or Ben."

"I'll find a way" Peter began to head out the door. "Thanks again Seward. See ya Ben"

"Peter wait!" called out Ben. Peter paused halfway out the door.

"General Techtronics...Garrid...They were the company that-"

"That developed the machine which irradiated our old friend the spider." Intercut Peter.

"Why do you want a job with those guys?"

"That baby is of my irradiated blood Ben. It has my mutated genetics. It may well inherit our abilities. Heck since it's a second generation it might not be exactly like you or me. For all we know it might sprout hairy legs on it's thirteenth birthday. I've got to find out more about the process which turned me, er...you, into Spider-Man. If I can do that I can find out more about yo- I mean me and therefore do my best to prepare for anything your little niece or nephew might face."

"That...That's actually really smart Peter"

Peter smiled properly for the first time since he'd entered the lab.

"Well you don't have to sound so surprised. I mean if you think I'm a dummy what does that make you?"

"Point taken. But seriously Peter that's..." Ben's face displayed a look of pride and admiration. "...Well that's really responsible."

"Well Benjy boy what can I say. After all, that baby...is my _greatest_ responsibility."

Peter left the lab.


	7. Chapter 7: Wasted Time Version 1

_**Peter and Mary Jane are back together, and yet something is eating away at Mary Jane...**_

 _I've done two versions of this story so I'd appreciate it if people could read both parts and tell me which one they prefer._

 _As for the story itself, you can imagine this story taking place during J. Michael Straczynski's run on Spider-Man shortly after Amazing Spider-Man Volume 2 #54 when Peter and Mary Jane have recently gotten back together._

 _Please leave a review as I am keen for feedback._

* * *

It was dark in the bedroom. The only source of light came from the illuminated outline of a door adjacent to the bed where a hairdryer was whirring away.

Peter had been lying down and staring straight up at the ceiling fan for almost an hour now. He decided to stretch his legs and padded over to the window. He moved the blinds and gazed out upon New York at night.

He was so lost in the beauty of the cityscape he'd not realised the whirring sound had stopped and the door had creaked open behind him.

"Enjoying yourself?" A soft voice asked him.

Peter turned around and saw MJ standing in the doorway, holding the hairdryer, steam evaporating behind her. Seeing her framed like that reminded Peter of when he first laid eyes on MJ in the doorway of Anna Watson's home so many years ago. Except back then she had been wearing more than a bathrobe.

"Yeah." He replied.

"Didn't realise you had such a great view from here. Usually we're too... _preoccupied_ whenever we come up here."

MJ gave a small smile as she walked across the room and flicked on a light switch, bathing the room in a soft orange glow.

"We've been _preoccupied_ a lot lately." She said mischievously.

Peter walked over to her and put his arms around her waist.

"Probably making up for lost time." He said, returning MJ's mischievous tone. Mary Jane put her arms around Peter's neck and hugged him.

"More like wasted time." She said quietly.

"Compared to this any other time is time wasted." He whispered as he kissed her neck. But MJ wasn't in the mood, removing her arms from around Peter's neck and gently pushing away from him. Peter's look of light disappointment was replaced by one of concern as MJ fixed him with a sad and sombre look.

"I'm serious though tiger. When I think back on all that time we spent apart, I...I just can't believe how stupid I-"

"Hey!" Peter interrupted sharply. "How stupid _I_ -"

"How stupid _we_ were." It was MJ who interrupted this time.

"I mean our lives...our lives aren't exactly safe. However much we try to not think about it, at the back of our minds...we know that one of us might not make it through the day because of one nut job or another. And between when I left and went to L.A. and when we got back together, we just wasted...God; I don't even know how much time. But it was time we could've spent together instead of being apart for just...just meaningless reasons..."

She looked down at the ground sadly. "And we're never gonna get that time back."

Peter moved his hands down from MJ's waist to her hands, squeezing them lightly.

"I know MJ. I know." He said softly.

"But...It's pointless to beat ourselves up over the time we've lost. Not when we could take the time we have now and make it count...Okay?"

MJ stared back at Peter for a second or two before answering.

"Okay." She said with a little nod. She gave a small smile and tilted her head.

"When did we switch places? Aren't _I_ usually the one telling _you_ to stop worrying?"

Peter chuckled slightly.

"I dunno...maybe we're rubbing off on one another."

MJ arched an eyebrow.

"Interesting choice of words..."

She turned the light back off.


	8. Chapter 8: Wasted Time Version 2

_**Peter and Mary Jane are back together, and yet something is eating away at Mary Jane...**_

 _I've done two versions of this story so I'd appreciate it if people could read both parts and tell me which one they prefer._

 _As for the story itself, you can imagine this story taking place during J. Michael Straczynski's run on Spider-Man shortly after Amazing Spider-Man Volume 2 #54 when Peter and Mary Jane have recently gotten back together._

 _Please leave a review as I am keen for feedback._

* * *

Peter stared up at the ceiling as the fan slowly turned. His fingers were linked behind his head on the pillow. Golden light filtered through the blinds onto the bed as the sun set over New York City and night began descending.

Peter turned his head and stared towards the window, peering at the city through the gaps in the blinds.

"Nice view you've got here" He called out.

"You haven't noticed that before?" MJ replied, raising her voice so Peter could hear. The corner of his mouth twitched into a tiny smile.

"Whenever I've been in here we've been kinda busy."

He heard hinges lightly creek and turned his head back so that he was now facing the opposite side of the bed. The once slightly adjacent door was now fully open, with MJ standing in it giving Peter a small smile. Peter was reminded of when he first laid eyes on MJ in the doorway of Anna Watson's home many years ago. Except back then she hadn't been wearing a bathrobe and her hair wasn't slightly wet.

"We've been 'kinda busy' a lot recently" She said, as she crossed the room and lay on the bed next Peter, tossing his shirt onto the floor. Peter turned his head back up to the ceiling to watch the fan.

"Probably making up for lost time" He said casually.

There was a slight pause before MJ leaned over and kissed his cheek. Peter moved his gaze away from the ceiling and onto MJ.

"More like wasted time" She said quietly, before she kissed him again, this time on the lips. Peter unlinked his fingers and moved his arm and torso around so that he could hug MJ around the waist.

"Compared to this any other time is time wasted" He teased, after they'd broken apart. His expression changed though when he saw that MJ didn't seem amused at all. "What's the matter?" He asked.

MJ continued to look more serious as she sat up and propped a pillow behind her. Peter followed suit. For a moment or two MJ just stared out straight ahead.

"It's just..." She began, seemingly searching for the right words. "It's just...we really did waste time didn't we?"

MJ's head turned to look at Peter, who just stared at her, unsure of what to say. "Errrr..." Was about all he could manage.

MJ seemed slightly exacerbated, but also slightly amused. "What I mean is...whether it was months or years...we wasted a lot of time we could've spent together. Time we can't get back. All because I was-"

"Hey, no!" Peter interjected. "Don't blame yourself okay. I was the one who-"

This time MJ interjected. " _You_ , me, both of us, whatever. Point is...whether we weren't in a good place, or being stupid, or prideful, or however you want to look at it...we spent a lot of time apart. Or at least not together. Not like we are now anyway. And recently...recently it's been getting me kinda..." MJ trailed off and turned away, uncertainty etched on her face.

"Anxious?" Peter offered. MJ shrugged and gave a small nod. "But why though? MJ we're together now right? What's to worry about?"

MJ didn't answer immediately, but instead continued to stare dead ahead. Finally though, she turned back to look at Peter. Staring straight into his face she replied in a flat and neutral voice.

"I'm worried something bad will happen to us?"

Peter was surprised at this. He'd thought things had been going very well since he and MJ got back together awhile ago. "I...I thought we were good MJ. Not perfect or anything, but I thought we were in a good place. You seemed...you seemed happy."

"I am!" MJ exclaimed, taking Peter's hands in hers'. "Really I am. We're great, tiger. Really great."

"Then if _you're_ feeling good about us...Are you anxious because you think _I'm_ not? Because if you are you gotta know MJ these passed months have bee-"

MJ shook her head, the glint of a smile at Peter's befuddlement crossing her mouth. "Tiger, I'm not worried about you. Or me! At least...not in that way"

"Then what way are you talking about?" For a second or two, MJ didn't break her gaze. But then she turned away and sat on the side of the bed. For about two or three minutes she didn't do anything. Peter waited patiently as the light in the room diminished to the point where it was too dark to see properly. And then, from out of the semi-darkness MJ spoke.

"I'm...I'm worried one of us will get hurt..."

Peter stared at MJ's back, a dark silhouette in the withering light.

"Wh...Why would you think that..." He asked.

He saw MJ turn around to look at him, flicking on a lamp next to the bed, illuminating a look of almost sad exacerbation.

"Come on tiger...you know why."

Peter sighed deeply.

"That other guy in our relationship..."

"There is no other guy tiger. Just you."

"And I thought we'd put things to bed about...me...?"

"We have. Or we pretty much have."

"You know the risks MJ. You accepted them. I accepted them. I know it's hard for you. Heck it's hard for me too but...after all this time I thought we'd...come to an understanding"

"We have come to an understanding Peter. It's just...Our lives are dangerous. Hell living in this city, _everyone's_ life is dangerous, but ours more than most. And...however much either of us tries not to think about that, at the back of our minds we both know that any moment of any day might be our last. Every time we say goodbye to one another we both know there is a chance, a very real chance, that one of us might not come back.

I mean let's be honest here tiger, ever since we began our life together the reason why we took every chance we could to... _be together_ , was because we never knew that'd be our last chance."

Peter frowned. "But what's that got to do with us now? Whether it's here or at my place, we're just doing what we did before, right? Why's that got you worried"

MJ took Peter's hand and squeezed it gently for a moment. "Because...we wasted so much time apart Peter. And I can't help thinking, what if something happens _now_. Now that we're back together. Cruel irony, wouldn't that just be-"

"The 'Parker Luck'?" Peter butted in.

MJ tilted her head to the side, then shrugged. "Well...yeah something like that. After all that time we could've spent together, but didn't for...for meaningless reasons, we get screwed when we _finally_ figure things out. And then one or both of us are left wishing we'd not thrown away that time we had by _not_ being together. Wishing we could've used that time for one more moment with each other."

Peter looked down and closed his eyes. Realising how this had been eating away at MJ stung bad. He opened them again and took MJ's other hand, squeezing it reassuringly.

"Mary Jane...we...we can't worry about that stuff. And we can't get back the time we lost. Because you're right...we've always made the most of the time we've had together, because we never know for certain if we'll have anymore. So...as much time as we wasted before when we weren't together...we can't afford to waste anymore time worrying about the yesterdays we've lost, or if we will or won't have any tomorrows. Let's just...Let's just live as much for today as we can...okay?"

MJ gave him a piercing look before slowly nodding and again squeezing peter's hand. "Sorry for being...well...like you most of the time honestly. All worry and guilt." She gave a tiny little smile which Peter returned.

"It's okay. For the record I didn't mind 'being you' for a change. Though I don't like how we seem to be rubbing off on each other."

MJ arched an eyebrow.

"Well...I dunno about that..."

The room fell into total darkness as MJ turned the lamp off.


	9. Chapter 9: One More Day Redux

**_Aunt May is dying and its all Spider-Man's fault. The only person who can save her is the the demon Mephisto, but in exchange he wants the love Spider-Man shares with his wife, Mary Jane Watson Parker. The time has come for Peter Parker to make the biggest choice of his life. What. Will. He. Do?_**

 ** _SPOILERS!_**

 _If you want to read the story cold as its own thing skip this note section and there will be spoilers for canon Spider-Man stories as well as where you might predict the story to go._

 _This story revisits the infamous One More Day storyline, in which to save a dying Aunt May Spider-Man and his wife Mary Jane make a deal with the demon Mephisto and sell their marriage. Part of this story (and the inspiration for it) came from a brilliant essay covering One More Day that you can find on a website called spideykickbutt, so full credit to them for part of this._

 _If you want to read the story in full check out the eponymous trade paperback or else Amazing Spider-Man #544, Sensational Spider-Man #41, Friendly Neighborhood Spider-Man #24 and Amazing Spider-Man #545. Or you know...Google it I guess._

 _And please, don't forget to leave feedback!_

 _Anyway, on with the show!_

* * *

"It's okay. It's okay. It's all going to be okay. Go on, now, save May. **_Be the Hero_** _._ Be my hero."

She was holding his head in her hands, tilting it to the right whilst her own was tilted to the left. Their bodies were close and Peter was gripping her waist. They were starring deeply into one another's eyes.

He'd lost count of the times they'd held one another like this. Lost count of how often she'd comforted him and reassured him as she was now.

But it was as though it was all just some sick parody meant to mock them. The body language was right. So was the tone in her voice, the expression on her face, even the words themselves.

But what it meant...what it meant was nightmarish, twisted.

The images raced though Peter Parker's mind. Still shots, like the ones Peter used to take for the Daily Bugle.

Snap.

Mass destruction in the town of Stamford. Everyone there a victim of a super hero/super villain battle gone horribly wrong.

Snap.

Headlines demanding the government make super humans accountable and controllable.

Snap.

More headlines announcing the passage of the Super Human Registration Act.

Snap.

Tony Stark, the Invincible Iron Man, the Golden Avenger, asking Peter for help.

Snap.

Peter hugging Aunt May and Mary Jane close.

Snap.

Peter unmasking in front of a hundred cameras, Tony by his side.

Snap.

Super humans and costumed vigilantes imprisoned unjustly, stripped of all their rights.

Snap.

Peter and Tony at one another's throats.

Snap.

Peter throwing Mary Jane to the ground.

Snap.

Aunt May kneeling on the floor, blood oozing from a bullet wound.

Snap.

The Kingpin, broken and bloody before Peter's feet.

Snap.

May in a hospital bed, dying.

Snap.

Doctor Strange shaking his head.

Snap.

Doctor Octopus shaking his head.

Snap.

Reed Richards shaking his head.

Snap.

Snap.

Snap.

An endless sea of people, all of them shaking their heads solemnly.

Snap.

Mephisto. Deal maker. Evil incarnate.

Snap.

Mary Jane Watson Parker. His wife. Light of his life.

Snap.

A grin, the worst grin in the world, passing across crimson lips.

Snap.

"I want your love. I want your marriage."

That is how it had come to this.

Peter Parker had to choose in this moment.

Mephisto wanted their marriage. He wanted to change time itself so they'd never married and take away their 'once in a millennia love' from God Himself. To him it'd be a victory like no other, and then Peter and MJ would spend all eternity with a part of their soul in torment. Torment over what they had lost, their screams delighting the demon forevermore.

All in exchange for saving Aunt May's life, and saving Peter from spending the rest of his own life broken in two, unable to live with the crushing guilt of her death.

He'd told Mary Jane that. It'd been...what?

Hours ago? Minutes? He wasn't sure anymore.

But he'd told her. He'd told her that straight when she brought up that maybe they should just let May go, that maybe it was just her time.

And she hadn't been happy with what he'd said. She'd said he was putting the onus on her, although that hadn't been his intention...had it?

He was tired. Tired and desperate. He didn't know for certain what he'd meant then, or before that. He wasn't even sure of himself right here and right now. He just knew he wanted more than anything to save Aunt May.

He just wanted to see the kindest, sweetest woman there'd ever been healthy and whole again. He couldn't let her die, he couldn't have her death on his conscience the way his Uncle's was.

He'd not acted then either, and it'd cost him and May every day since.

It'd been different with Gwen though. He'd acted to save her, he'd done the right thing...but in the wrong way. For all his power and good intentions he'd killed the first woman he'd ever loved. He'd have broken then too, if not for Mary Jane being there for him.

She'd been there for him many times after that too. Always putting him back together when he needed her to. Always being his rock.

His hero.

And it'd cost her deeply. She'd lived through injures, kidnappings, threats to herself and her loved ones, the stress of worrying about him, and so much more.

And here she was again, willing to sacrifice their love, their future together and even condemn herself to endless pain...for him.

She'd not only ultimately agreed to this deal, she'd sweetened it. She'd made sure his identity became secret again and that he'd have a chance to be happy. She was ready to save May for him. She was ready to make sure he didn't live with the unbearable guilt. She was ready to be his hero once more, and yet again convince him to be one too.

One word. That'd all it'd take. One word and he _would_ be that hero.

One simple 'Yes' and everything would be okay. May would live. He wouldn't be guilty anymore. He'd get his life back.

This was the right thing to do; even Mary Jane was saying so.

This was the _responsible_ thing to do...Wasn't it?...

The photos began in his mind again.

Snap.

He was a child crying in his bedroom in the middle of the night, Aunt May rocking him in her arms as he sobbed.

Snap.

He was a man, barely out of his teens, sobbing into his hands as Mary Jane shut a door in defiance, refusing to leave him.

Snap.

Uncle Ben and he tucked into wheat cakes May was serving with a warm smile.

Snap.

Mary Jane's arms were around his neck as they kissed in an airport, deep down knowing they were never going to be the same again.

Snap.

Aunt May was sobbing at Uncle Ben's grave.

Snap.

Mary Jane was shaking at the sight of Peter's bloody face.

Snap.

Peter was throwing off tons of heavy metal off his back, determined to free himself and save Aunt May from death.

Snap.

He was scrabbling his way through the ground, surfacing out of a grave, his thoughts focussed upon Mary Jane.

Snap.

Aunt May was crying tears of joy as Mary Jane and Peter danced close together, MJ's elegant white veil flowing behind her.

Snap.

Mary Jane standing before him, her eyes wet with grief, her hands tilting his head, and all around him darkness tinged with a malevolent red glow.

And then...he knew.

He understood.

And it hurt him to do so.

But he could do nothing else.

He let go of Mary Jane. He moved her hands away from his head. He broke their gaze...and turned to Mephisto.

"I love my aunt more than life itself. I would willingly give mine up to save hers..."

He gulped hard and clenched his fists, staring straight into the glowing eyes of the demon.

"But as you said, with Mary Jane, I have the love of a millennia. I have a woman who has continued to love me regardless of the Hell that it has put her through... ** _AND I AM NOT GIVING THAT UP!_** "

Behind him he heard Mary Jane give gasp. Mephisto though simply stared coldly back at him.

"And you know what..." Peter pressed on. "Aunt May wouldn't want me to give it up either." He scowled and took a step forward jabbing a finger in Mephisto's face. "So crawl back into your palace of fire and brimstone and taunt some other pathetic soul with your so-called offer!"

Mephisto's expression changed at this, venomous irritation forming on his malevolent face.

"You are a fool Peter Parker." He rasped. "You would condemn to death the woman who was a mother unto you? You will never be able to live with yourself. You will be destroyed. Your love shall leave you and you shall have nothing...What will you be then?"

Peter didn't answer.

"Well..." Mephisto's spoke more casually now. "Perhaps you'd like to see exactly what you are choosing."

Mephisto snapped his fingers and everything flashed around them. A moment later Peter blinked his eyes rapidly, soon enough bringing them into focus revealing...

" _Aunt May!_ "

They were in the hospital room, May was surrounded by doctors and nurses attending to her urgently as machines were making alarming noises. Peter rushed forwards and tried to nudge aside an attendee. He passed right through them.

"I'm afraid you aren't really here Mr. Parker. I'm just letting you see firsthand what you are about to be responsible for."

Mephisto clicked his fingers again and the attendees and their voices vanished into thin air.

Mary Jane ran up to the other side of the hospital bed. She was looking around frantically at May and then up at Peter.

"Peter...Peter you can't!" She whispered.

Peter looked at her and then down at his aunt.

"I'm sorry." He said his voice shaky. It wasn't meant just for May. It was for Mary Jane too, and Uncle Ben, and God, and maybe anyone else who'd ever believed in him.

Mary Jane grasped his wrists and leaned forwards.

"Please Peter. Please don't...don't choose me over her! _I_ can't live with that!" Her voice was more desperate and pleading than Peter had ever heard it before. In that moment, somehow he learned to hate himself just a little bit more.

"Don't say that MJ." He closed his eyes and inhaled through his nostrils, trying desperately to push away the sight and sounds of Aunt May dying right in front of him. "Don't even think it. This is _not_ your fault. None of this could ever be your fault. It's all on me." He opened his eyes and looked up at her. "I love you. I need you. And I meant every word of what I said before. I can't give you up. And maybe that's selfish but...making this deal would be selfish too."

MJ swallowed. "Wha-What do you mean?" Peter heard the hesitation in her voice. He pressed on determinedly keeping his eyes locked onto MJ's deep green irises, refusing to stare down at May.

"I mean...everything I've done so far...everything I've done to try and save May...It's never been about doing the right thing...It's been about me...Me and my guilt...I wanted to save her so I wouldn't have to live with the guilt of her death. But I know...I know she didn't want to be saved. I know that she wouldn't want me to throw away everything for her. And you...you are _everything_ to me."

MJ didn't say anything. She simply stared at Peter unable to reply, or perhaps unsure what to even say.

"If I make this deal I'll save May's life. But she's lived _for me._ I'd be betraying her in the worst way possible...and I'd be hurting you. I'd be hurting you even more than I already have."

"You hav-" Began MJ, but Peter cut her off.

" _Yes I have_." He spoke with such firmness that MJ actually took a tiny step back. "Not just when I unmasked, or even all the other stuff I've put you through. MJ...whatever I said, whatever I believed...I guilt tripped you into going along with this. I put everything on you and you agreed to hurt yourself all because you wanted to make _me_ happy. You wanted to relieve _my_ guilt...And I almost agreed to that."

Peter's eyes began to sparkle.

"I almost agreed to hurt you like I've hurt you before, like I hurt Uncle Ben and Gwen and Aunt May."

He began sobbing now, not even bothering to wipe away the tears.

"I'm sorry Mary Jane. I'm so sorry for all of this. I'm sorry I even thought about letting you get hurt for me, or for anyone."

Without thinking Mary Jane swiftly walked forwards through May and embraced Peter.

"It's okay." She said, crying herself. "It's okay tiger. I forgive you. You didn't...you didn't do anything wrong."

"No, but he's about to."

The sound of Mephisto's voice cleared Peter's head and the horrible reality of what was happening rushed back, stabbing Peter in the chest.

"One word Mr. Parker. Just one word, and she lives."

"No." Hissed Peter, hugging MJ tighter.

"If you don't act now it shall be like your Uncle all over again."

"No!"

"You will be destroyed by the guilt little Spider. You will never-"

" ** _He'll live!_** " Shouted Mary Jane, turning her head to face the demon, a dirty scowl etched onto her face. "He'll live and he'll be _happy!_ I'll make sure he will."

Mephisto gave a deep guttural growl that seemed to echo throughout the room, reaching deep into Peter's chest.

"He's right." Pressed on MJ. "May wouldn't want him to do deal with you. She wouldn't want him to sacrifice anyone for her, least of all himself."

"Quite right dear."

Peter and MJ parted and stepped back from May's bed in astonishment.

On the other side of it stood Aunt May herself, looking as healthy and whole as she ever had.

"Au-Aunt May?" Stammered Peter.

"Hello Peter dear."

Peter looked back at the bed and saw May laying there, the tubes and other equipment still hooked into her. And is seeing her, he also registered a high pitched monotone beeping sound. He turned to the heart rate monitor May was attached to and saw the solid flat line running across it.

His breath caught in his throat.

"How...how are you-" Vaguely, Peter was taken aback by the quiet note of confusion in Mephisto's voice.

May turned to Mephisto and gave him a deeply condescending look.

"How am I here? I'm not really certain. Though I'd imagine it was down to somebody who's not too fond of you."

She turned back to Peter and MJ, who were standing side by side, their faces a mixture of uncertainty and sadness.

"Oh now, don't be like that." Said May with a smile."Neither of you should feel guilty about this. I'm not so naive as to think you are going to walk away wholeheartedly believing that, but it is the truth you know."

Peter suddenly found his voice.

"You were hurt because of me." There was something childlike in his tone.

"No dear. I was hurt because of some very bad people did some very bad things. And everything else was my decision to make. I agreed to let you unmask. I agreed to stay by your side. I knew the risks and I went along with it. And I'd do it a thousand more times too."

Peter didn't look consoled by this. Sighing deeply May pressed on.

"Peter...you remember what your Uncle Ben used to say?"

Peter paused as an image of the man flashed in his mind. As he spoke he could hear his voice echoing the words throughout the years.

"...With great power there must also come great responsibility..."

May nodded.

"And he was right. But sometimes dear...sometimes the most responsible thing to do is to _not_ act. Sometimes acting to save one life hurts other people. Sometimes trying to live up to one responsibility means you might have to do something irresponsible. And you will just have to decide each time what the lesser of two evils is."

Peter opened his mouth to reply to this, but May held up her hand to gently silence him.

"You feel you've failed by letting me die. But by doing that you've spared Mary Jane's soul, given her a chance for happiness, not helped this foul gentleman..." She gave a quick jerk of her head in Mephisto's general direction. "And you've saved your own life and soul too."

May walked through her own body towards Peter and MJ, taking Peter's hands in her own.

"You said it yourself. I lived my life _for you_. I wouldn't have wanted you to have given your happiness up for me. That would've condemned me to however many more years just wishing for you to have what you have right now with Mary Jane. And I know...I know that your Uncle, for as much as he loved me, would feel the same way."

She shot MJ an affectionate glance and let go of one of Peter's hands in order to grasp one of hers'.

"I'm proud of you for all the good you have done in the world Peter. I will be prouder still if you went on to do more. And for to do that, to be the hero you were always meant to be, you need Mary Jane. But your responsibility isn't just to the world, or even to your family and friends. You have a responsibility to yourself too. So..." She placed MJ's hand in Peter's and stared him dead in the eye. " _Be happy_. Be happy because you owe it to yourself. Be happy because you owe it to your wife, who's made that her business for the last several years. Be happy because you owe it to me, and to your uncle, and everyone who has ever cared about you."

Peter was rooted to the spot, the warmth of his aunt and his wife pulsating through his hands to the rest of his body. Eventually he gave a slow little nod.

"...I will...I will Aunt May."

"I know you will Peter, because you already believed all of that deep down didn't you."

"...Yeah...I guess I did..."

May smiled dolefully at her nephew.

"Of course you did. That's why you didn't agree to that deal. A mother can always tell these things you know. "

She winked and impossibly, Peter actually gave a small chuckle. Then he looked resolutely at her, the spark of an old fire beginning to reignite in his chest.

"I'll make everyday count as much as I can Aunt May. Your death won't be for nothing."

"...yeah...We won't let you down May." Reaffirmed Mary Jane, squeezing Peter's hand.

They heard a husky derisive laugh from out of site. Peter and MJ turned to see Mephisto.

"The world still knows who you are fool. You are both feared and hunted. What sort of life, what sort of happiness, can you possibly have?"

Before Peter or MJ could say anything, May spoke out, keeping her eyes on the pair of them and her voice calm despite the undertone of condescension.

"My Ben and I lived through our share of hard times. They got even harder after Peter came along. There were moments where we weren't sure that we could cope, but we stuck together and made it work somehow. The two of you have faced things together far worse than what I and Ben dealt with. We never lived day to day worried we might never see one another again. We never went on with our lives knowing that some monster might emerge from out of the blue to destroy us. And we never lost as much as either of you have. Through all of that you've both thrived and survived together. You've both found a way to be happy amidst the pain and the chaos invading your lives. Perhaps I am a little biased, but I don't think you should stop now just because things have gotten more difficult. I believe that you will find a way to fix this, to be happy, somehow."

May turned her head to look directly at Mephisto.

"And I believe dealing with _him_ will never help you no matter how tempting it might seem. There are far too many people who will attest to that I think."

Mephisto glared back at May and scowled.

"You heard my nephew you wretched thing. Go back to whatever lonesome place you came from and do not bother wasting my family's time with your little offers."

With that, Mephisto roared in frustration and vanished amidst a cloud of swirling red smoke. When the smoke cleared Peter noticed that they were back where they'd started, back in the motel where Mephisto had transported them from and where May had been shot.

May was still there though, but it seemed as though she was somehow _less_ there than before. She peered down at her hands and then looked back up at Peter and MJ.

"I think...I think I have to go now...Goodbye dear." There was a sad smile on her face as she spoke to Mary Jane

"Goodbye May." MJ spoke through tears, though her face was defiant. May turned her head.

"Peter...I'll miss you."

Peter had stopped crying a while ago. Fresh tears welled up in him but they weren't entirely sad somehow. As was the case when he was a child, Aunt May had a special knack for making him feel better. Now the moment had actually come, it didn't hurt as much as when he was dreading the worst.

"I'll miss you too Aunt May."

"I know. But after all you've seen and been through this isn't really goodbye forever you know. You'll see me and your uncle again one day. One day a long, long time from now. So take care of yourself and Mary Jane. Be the _real_ hero you always have been. And whenever things get hard, just remember what I told you all those years ago. You do remember it don't you?"

Peter smiled and nodded. In his mind he saw May in a wheelchair and robe, jabbing a finger at him, a fire burning in her eyes.

"Even though I'm an old woman, I'm not a **_quitter!_** A person need **_gumption_**...the will to live...to fight...We Parkers are tougher than people think!"

The corner of Peter's mouth twitched upwards for a moment as he drifted back to the present.

"Yes. Yes I remember."

May gave the warm, doting smile Peter had seen every day of his life growing up, the smile reserved just for him.

"Good dear. Then...Then I think I'll go say hello to Ben now...I love you Peter. And I always will."

Peter watched as that loving smile slowly but surely faded into the air itself and was at last...gone.

"I love you too Aunt May." He uttered into the silent darkness.

For a long while he and Mary Jane simply stood there in silence.

Eventually they set about changing their clothes and freshening up. Though they didn't speak, there was a silent understanding that they were heading towards the hospital. Mary Jane took awhile in the bathroom, rubbing her stomach when she emerged. She'd been sick earlier too after they'd initially heard the deal. Peter couldn't blame her for being unsettled under the circumstances. Were it not for his own sense of odd detachment at the moment, he was sure he'd feel the same way.

Then a possibility briefly raced though Peter's mind. It was a worrying idea, though he knew Aunt May would've thought it quite the opposite. Maybe she'd have been right, but Peter chose to push the idea away for the time being. It was a bridge that, if it even existed, they'd deal with when the time came.

Finally, when they were ready, they approached the door of their room. Peter opened it a crack and took note of how his Spider Sense wasn't warning him of danger, though he knew in a sense they were always in danger. Then again, he mused, they always had been.

He opened the door fully and lingered before the threshold for a moment before, peering out at the grubby motel grounds. Mary Jane moved past him, stepping outside into the open. She turned to face him dead on then took his head in her hands. Peter held her waist and moved closer.

"Ready to face the world tiger?" She whispered.

Peter mind raced for an instant. He saw police gunning at him. He saw Iron Man and other superheroes pursuing him. He saw Doc Ock, Venom, and the Goblin reaching out to grab at them, along with every other monster that'd ever held a grudge against him.

And then he saw Mary Jane, standing outside right in front of him, her emerald eyes boring into him.

"I can face anything if I'm with you." He replied.

Mary Jane tiled Peter's head to the left and her own to the right before their lips met.

Moments later they walked off together, their hands clasped in one another.


End file.
